Let’s be honest, when it comes to love triangles, no one really feels all that bad for the side pieces. They’ve put themselves in the situation and, yes, the guy is obviously a scum bag too, but there’s more than enough blame to go around.
The side piece is now, dare I say, common in the modern relationship. But, just like it’s not always easy hiding the fact you have a side piece from your partner, it’s also tough to be the ride-or-die on the side. This article explores the pros and cons of being deep in a love triangle and it’s hilarious and cringeworthy all at the same time.
The Big Man Has Your Back
God needs to be on your side quite a bit if you’re going to be taking pictures with your side chick. Man oh man did he come through with this one. He shone the light of forgiveness in this picture.
God wasn’t ready to see this man ruin his actual relationship because his side chick was getting a little too comfortable with their status. If you didn’t believe in God, you will now.
This Is An Awful Idea In The First Place
When you’re hanging out with your side chick, you want to keep your plans low key. Usually, a date night with “SC” will involve watching a movie at her house and maybe a drive-thru McDonald’s run.
The fact that this man was willing to go to the fair with his side chick tells you everything you need to know about him. He isn’t smart. This is a disaster waiting to happen.
Nothing To See Here
If you’re going to go out in public with your side chick there are a few precautionary steps you need to take. These aren’t suggestions, these tips are mandatory to follow through on.
You need to make sure that you’re in a different state AT LEAST. Heck, it’s even better if you’re in a different country. But, that’s not good enough. You’ll also need to wear a subtle or not-so-subtle mask to cover your face. This one in the picture works fine.
Don’t Get Played By Your Side Chick
If she’s a side chick, she’s probably pretty good at talking her way into situations, and talking her way out of situations The last thing you want is for your side bae to be two-timing you with another guy.
If she’s your true side chick, she won’t be side-chicking for other dudes. This picture is a live-look at a side chick playing four different guys at the same time. It’s hard to look at, I know.
You need to keep your side chick happy somehow without giving her any idea that you’re looking to take the relationship to the next level.
You’ll probably need to give her some small presents or concessions to let her know that you’re still thinking about her and caring for her. Those presents don’t need to be extravagant, but they do need to at least give the perception they’re coming from the heart.
Give Her What She Asks For
The worst thing you can do is get played by your side chick. If she hints that she wants some Michael Kors stuff, you need to surprise her with Michael Coors stuff.
See, it’s a play on words that is witty enough so she can’t be mad, but cheap enough so you have money to spend on your actual girlfriend. As you can see by this picture, this side chick, uh, loves her gift.
This Is Your Worst Nightmare
This man played this off very well considering he probably was having a mild heart attack while reading this. He’s right, getting a dragon for Christmas is a lot more likely to happen than her becoming his main chick.
If your side piece starts actually wanting to be in a relationship with you, it’s probably time to reconsider and start taking some other applications. Being jealous is a real thing that can be a slippery slope for side chicks.
Fake Her Out Every Once In A While
Girls love humor. In fact, a guy’s sense of humor is probably why he has a side chick, to begin with. So, don’t lose sight of that. It’s okay to play pranks like this on your SC as long as there’s a reason behind it.
This guy wants to see how his SC reacts to him asking for her hand in marriage. If she’s really excited about it, he should probably find a different girl. But, if she’s repulsed by it, you know she’s a keeper.
Romantic Dinners With Side Bae
When you go out for dinner with your side chick, you should take her to a romantic place. Your goal should be to set the mood, but not to let her break your bank.
So, the best way to go about that is to pre-order their cheapest dish for her, while you get the most expensive. This lets her know that you care about her, but you still have to have some savings left for your actual girlfriend.
This Is A Rehearsed Side Chick
Side chicks have been around for a long time. I mean, they date back to AT LEAST John F. Kennedy and his many mistresses. We’re looking at your Marilyn Monroe. Anyway, it’s good to see the evolution that they’ve been experiencing.
The lengths they’re starting to go to be subliminal and sneaky are absolutely insane. This picture shows a side chick who has been in the game a while and knows the ins and outs.
This Is A Cardinal Sin
There are a lot of ways that you can screw up your relationship with your side chick. But, the worst sin you can do if you have a side chick is to get her pregnant.
Side chicks are just supposed to be temporary and more of a blip on the radar. But, if you get her pregnant, you’re in a world of hurt. You should be doubling up on your protection if you’re going to have an SC.
Playing With Fire
Some guys try to hide the fact that a girl is his side chick. These are the fools who will always ruin both relationships because of their lack of communication.
If you’re going to go all in on an SC, she needs to know she’s an SC. There’s no point in hiding the situation because she’s going to find out one way or another. Girls are all members of the CIA and can find anything out about you.
Pour One Out For Him
Let’s just hope that he’s the side dude, and not in the friend zone. As hard as it is to get out of being the side dude, it’s way harder to get out of the friend zone. It’s been done before, but it doesn’t happen too often.
We should pour one out for this guy because his mind is probably racing a million miles a minute. As always, flowers seem to do the trick.
Avoid At All Cost
There’s nothing more awkward and awful than seeing your side chick out at the mall or in public when you’re with your main girl. You must do everything in your power to avoid that situation at all costs.
If you have to pretend to be a mannequin then that’s what you do. If you have to pretend to be a woman by putting on a wig and disguising yourself, you do it.
This Is Risky
We have to give this guy some serious respect. It’s not too often that you see a guy kissing his side chick while his girlfriend is in the area. This takes a lot of coconuts and he was able to pull it off.
He has the perfect plan. He knows that if his GF is on his shoulder’s she can’t really do anything to hurt him or his side chick. Executed perfectly.
When Your Side Chick Wants To Know More About You
Some guys don’t want their side chicks knowing anything about their life. Their relationship is strictly transactional. This is one of those moments when an SC was trying to get her man to show her more of his everyday life.
He decided to shut her advances down entirely by showing a picture of him, uh, being very cozy with the work toilet. This is one strategy to keep the side chick at bay.
The Side Chick Bubble Bath
Sometimes you have to put your side chick to work. If she’s going to come over to your house while your main chick is away, she can at least help clean up her mess.
This guy wanted to make doing the dishes a little bit more romantic than usual, so he added some candles. Now all he needs is some rose petals and it’s looking like a promising night for the both of them.
When You’ve Been Caught With A Side Chick
Your life after you’ve been caught with a side chick will not be the same. In fact, looking at this picture should probably scare you enough to not want a side chick in the first place.
This man was caught with a side chick and now he lives a terrible life under constant surveillance. This picture makes me shed a tear a little bit. Let’s hope he’s ended up okay.
The Pyscho Side Chick
Unfortunately, if you’re willing to be a side chick and put up with all the craziness that comes along with it, you’re probably a little psycho.
This side chick takes it to an entirely different level. She wants her man to know that she’s locked and loaded. Fellas, I hate to warn you, but when you get into side chick territory, anything can happen. You should expect the unexpected at all times.
Girls, Just Choose Pizza
I don’t want to discourage women from wanting dudes, but you need to think about your options. It’s probably very safe for you to choose pizza instead of guys.
Pizza will not have a side chick. In fact, pizza will always give you the attention you deserve. It’ll never cheat, steal, or lie to you. It might come in HOT, but give it some time and it will always cool down enough for you to enjoy its presence.